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Scandalous Behavior: What
Happens At The Afterparty, Stays At The Afterparty! by Sheena Metal
 Musicians
work hard. They write for days. They rehearse like
fiends. Drag heavy gear here and there. Sweat like pigs on
stage. Put marathon hours in at the recording studio. Work
their fingers to the bone…well, at least into some pretty gnarly
calluses. But, musicians also like to play hard: booze, drugs,
groupies, and trashed hotel rooms are actually more occupational
hazards that rock ‘n’ roll myths.
No matter how disciplined an artist needs to be for his or her music,
they will always need to blow off steam in some way or another.
Some hit the gym, run, partake in extreme sports, do yoga, pursue their
spirituality, web surf, build custom guitars, restore classic cars…you
name it. All of these outlets help musicians to handle the
enormous flow of energy so necessary to channel the creative
process. Still, other musicians prefer a more debaucherous form
of escapism. They drink until they puke, get stoned and eat a
case of Cheetos, or sleep with all of their friends’ sisters.
This wild lifestyle, albeit a music cliché, may feel terrific at
the moment, but many musicians clearly forget that the days of offstage
antics circling around the buzz of the band, like whispers in the wind,
are long gone. These days, fans carry camera phones to gigs,
friends videotape your band’s every move, and everybody’s a
blogger. The afterparty, once simply a chance to blow off steam
with loved ones and lovers of your music alike, has now gone from the
innocent scandal of, “Oh my God, did you hear what happened after the
gig Saturday?” to a website monitoring every second of debased insanity
with pictures, video, and descriptive essays.
This new unexpected publicity may increase the number of crazed
partiers at your next gig, but what happens when the entertainment
attorney you’ve been courting, the A&R guy you’ve been hoping to
hear back from, or the manager you’ve been telling how serious you are
about your music, pops on the internet and finds your drummer passed
out in the pool, your bassist vomiting in someone’s bushes and your
guitarist naked in a stranger’s bed with cheerleaders of questionable
age?
The following are a few tips that may help you to throw a terrific
afterparty without the ramifications hurting your career in the long
run:
1.) Pick A Designated
Partygoer---As much as this thought may send shivers through the spine
of any wild-at-heart musician, it’s a good idea to have someone at your
afterparty keeping an eye on those who’ve sold their souls for rock ‘n’
roll…or at least Jack Daniels. Whether you rotate it from gig to
gig, or find a friend of the band (girlfriend, manager, a bandmate’s
brother, etc.) who’ll stay sober enough to make sure that no one does
anything stupid…and if they do, that it won’t be “caught on
tape.” Playing Band Hall Monitor is truly a thankless job for
anyone who parties hardy, so maybe free admission to the gig and some
cool band swag as compensation would be a nice way to say “Thank You
for being our assigned killjoy tonight!”
2.) Set Some Guidelines
For Your Band And Fans---I know it sounds like Big Brother is busting
up your raging good time but when you’re talking about your career,
it’s better to be safe than sorry. Have a chat with your band
explaining that extreme behavior needs to be controlled at parties
where fans are recording events. Post on your web site, and your
fan club or have a Pow Wow at the gig and explain to your people that,
while you love all of the cool photos and videos they take of the band
at the gig, there has to be a few rules for what can be shot
offstage. Be honest. Let your friends/fans know that you
love partying with them but that the band’s reputation is an important
ingredient for its success and that it’s vital that certain memories be
enjoyed by partygoers only and not preserved in cyberspace for the
world to see.
3.) Monitor Your
Websites And Web Communities---Again, better safe than sorry.
It’s always a good idea to visit your forums, message boards, photo
galleries, fan clubs, blogs and online communities to see what the
latest scoop on your band is. It’s also wise to retain approval
privilege on anything posted on each of your band sites. Let
people post all of the drunken, naked pictures they want, and then pick
and choose which images you want to represent your band. The same
applies to comments and posts. Remember fans are important and
priceless but it’s ultimately your image to preserve to the industry
and the world and your web presence is how you represent yourself to
everyone interested in you from fans to labels and everything in
between.
4.) Dial Your
Scandalous Behavior Back A Bit---It’s all well and good for your
drummer to sleep with your girlfriend’s mom on his own time, but at
band functions make sure that the behavior is kept professional.
In our modern society, the lines between reality and publicity have
become so blurred that a simple kegger in your singer’s garage can get
more coverage than a Grammy Pre-Show Special. Sadly, that may
simply mean changing the standards of band partying to those that you
exhibit at gigs. Throw private parties and have orgies in your
grandma’s bathtub, but when it’s music related you’re, in a sense, at
work and should act accordingly.
I realize that telling musicians not to party, is like telling a dog
not to lick its private parts and if, after reading this, you feel that
the thrill of the over-the-edge rock ‘n’ roll afterparty is completely
ruined, don’t change your major to math just yet. Remember, doors
lock, parties can be invitation only, cameras turn off, and bloggers
can be taught to use discretion. You can still live like Jim
Morrison at Scott Weiland’s toga party; just do your best to keep it
off the internet. While a little scandal is titillating, a lot of
scandal just says to a label, “Sure. We’ll take your money and
then we’ll blow it all on Tequila and show up to the studio three hours
late every day.” Show the industry you’re serious, put on a
professional face, and give your website the appearance of a band
that’s fun and responsible. Then, have a private party, invite
the Dallas Cowboy Cheerleaders, a donkey, the drug dealer next door,
and your guitarist’s horny aunt and throw a party that would make the
cast of Half Baked blush. After all, you’ve got to fight for your
right to party…in secret…with the digital cameras unplugged.
Sheena Metal is a
radio host,
producer, promoter, music supervisor, consultant, columnist, journalist
and musician. Her syndicated radio program, Music Highway Radio,
airs
on over 700 affiliates to more than 126 million listeners. Her
musicians' assistance program, Music Highway, boasts over 10,000
members. She currently promotes numerous live shows weekly in the
Los
Angeles Area, where she resides. For more info: http://www.sheena-metal.com.
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